"I love you more today..." Really?

"I love you more today than the day I married you."

We've all heard people say it.  But come on...

Really?

I mean it's a lovely sentiment and all, but really?

Really?

Most wedding days are magical and whimsical and produce love-induced comas and are basically pretty hard to top.

So, yeah, we get it...you're still in in love and all, but "more today?"  

Really?  

My own wedding day was nine years ago today, and it is full of moments I will never, ever forget.  

I woke up at 4:38am in my bed at my mom's house.  No alarm or anything.  And I could not, could not, go back to bed.  It was not for lack of trying.  I tossed.  I turned.  I tried to lay still and just drift back to sleep, but I couldn't.   I was so beyond excited for that day to start.  I got to marry my best friend and then have a party with our family and friends in a matter of hours.  The day simply couldn't  begin soon enough!  At 6:00am, when I figured out there was no way any type of sleep was in my future, I did hop out of bed and open a few wedding gifts that had been sent to my mom's house, and finally decided that 6:30am would be at least a reasonable time to be up and around, without making my mom wonder if I was crazy or something was wrong.

I remember seeing him for the very first time that day.  We took pictures before the ceremony began, so the very first time we saw each other on our wedding day, it was simply the two of us and the photographer in the sanctuary.  My groom was waiting at the altar, and I walked down the aisle to meet him.  When I was about 20 feet away, the photographer said, "Trevor, you may turn around and see your bride."  I will never forget the moment he turned around and our eyes met, or the butterflies I felt at that moment.  I was undeniably, without a doubt, the luckiest girl in the world.

Our day was absolutely perfect.  The ceremony was beautiful.  The reception was amazing.   That is not to say everything went off without a hitch...there were lots of 'hitches' along the way, but it didn't matter.  I was so head over heels in love, nothing could have phased me that day.  I remember telling everyone I loved them at the reception when I saw them throughout the night.  Because I did.  I truly did.  I was so overwhelmingly full of love, I felt like I needed to tell everyone how much I loved them and how thankful I was they were there to share in that special day with us.

There was a whole lot of love going on that day, and all the rainbows and butterflies and wedding business to make it almost a 'surreal' love.

"I love you more today than the day I married you."

Really?

We're nine years in.

A lot has happened.  A lot has changed.

We moved into a rental house, then out of a rental house.  We bought our own house.  

We began jobs that became careers.  And saw changes from one job to another.  We saw each other through finishing our masters' degrees.  

We went to Mexico.  And Ireland.  And Italy.  And learned how to completely lean on one another to figure things out and navigate our way in a foreign place.  

We traded in college cars for cars that actually worked.  And then cars that got better fuel mileage.  And then cars that would hold car seats.  

We became parents.  Together.  I could not imagine sharing that experience and that exact moment when our son was placed in our arms with anyone else.  Then we became parents again.  And again, I could not imagine walking that journey with anyone else.

Now when I wake up at 4:38am, it's because one of our children is having a night terror or wet the bed, and I long for the second I can fall back asleep.  Slightly different than nine years ago...

As parents, we've had to figure out this whole "marriage" thing all over again and how to parent together and how to make it all work.  Most days it does, some days it doesn't.  But we are learning.  Together.  

We lost your mom.  We experienced grief and mourning together.  I didn't always know the right words.  All I wanted to do was take your pain away.  Sometimes I still wish I could.  But we journeyed that difficult road together.

We've celebrated nine Christmases, nine Easters, nine birthdays, nine Valentine's Days and now nine anniversaries.  

A lot has happened in nine years.  A lot has changed in nine years.

But here's the weird thing about all that stuff...we've done it together.

Together.

It's part of our story.  

Of our family.  

All of that is now part of us, and who we are.

Together.

It hasn't always been easy, but what I look at what we've done together, what we've supported each other through, what we've built together, and I know our love is stronger because of it.  I know it is a love that can withstand hard times and challenges.  It was an amazing love nine years ago when I said "I do," but it has become a stronger, deeper, even more amazing love today.

So, yes, really.  

I love you more today than I did nine years ago, when on this very day I said "I do."  

I meant it then, and I mean it even more now.  I still do.  And I would say "I do" in a heartbeat if I had it all to do over again.  

We have grown together.  We have laughed together.  We have cried together.  We have made a life together.  We have talked, even when it was hard.  We have listened, even when it was harder.  We have had great joys and blessings beyond anything we could have hoped or dreamed for nine years ago.

You are my perfect provision.  You are my own and only.  You are my best my friend.

I love you more today than the day I married you.

Really, really.

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I feel so lucky to have a husband who believes in me as a wife, as a mother, as a person.  You're a Good Mom.  To my husband, thank you for reminding me of these words when I forget them myself, and for helping me to believe them.  


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